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I joked I went into breastfeeding as a FTM with vibes only. In hindsight I really had no idea what I was doing, and really didn’t know what to expect. I was blessed with a baby who latched damn near perfect from the get-go, a great supply and wonderful support from my husband but here’s what I wish I would have known. Babies are fussy, regardless of their food source. I always see lots of moms on here upset or pushed to formula because their baby was fussy. More commonly, people assuming their supply is low because of fusiness. But this is just part of it, and it gets better. Track wet diapers, and if they are having enough you gotta trust your body is doing it’s thing. I know how hard it can be to not SEE how much your baby is getting when you are nursing. But as long as they are growing on their curve, and having enough wet diapers, trust yourself EVEN if they fuss (see #1) The 6 week growth spurt is hell..I heard soooo much about the 4 month sleep regression on tik Tok, but absolutely nothing about those first few big growth spurts..omg. my baby cried for hours every night and was inconsolable until she magically was fine. Newborns also have a lot of gas. You don’t need to cut out diary, soy, etc etc at the first sign of a gassy baby. Breastfeeding is a lot of hard work, and having a supportive partner really could make or break the journey for you. I could not have made it to 6 months without a wonderful husband who took care of the dogs, brought me drinks, snacks and helped take care of me post c-section. And finally, I also saw a lot on tik Tok about how people stopped breastfeeding to save their mental health. & I respect those women, we gotta take care of ourselves. But it scared me, but honestly breastfeeding HELPED my mental health post-partum. I still had post-partum anxiety and depression, and am doing much better on an SSRI BUT getting so many quiet moments, just me and my baby, nursing her made me feel so so much better. I think it’s important to share how beneficial breastfeeding can be for your mental health too. Now onto my next goal, 1 year EBFing! via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/StylP5T

Today we had to go register my son’s birth. It’s the first time we have taken him out in the almost 3 weeks we’ve had him. I was quite anxious about needing to feed him in public. I don’t have a lot of accessible clothes so I went with a v-neck summer dress. I fed him in the waiting room of the register’s office and used a cover. I’m so proud of myself. And I didn’t even use a nipple shield because he knocked it off before latching and was already starting to fuss so I just went for it and we were very successful. I know it’s not a huge deal but I don’t have anyone I can really share this with. My husband didn’t see it as a big deal. But it felt huge to me. I’m finally feeling more confident about taking him out. I think tomorrow we are going to venture to the mall! via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/nfZX4wo

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Okay, so I understand that this is the opposite of what a lot of breastfeeding moms experience. I’m hoping I’m not speaking into the void here.Have any other moms had an issue where it seems like you’re losing too much weight while breastfeeding?I’ve been exclusively breastfeeding for 7.5mos now and it seems like no matter how many calories I consume, I can’t seem to keep weight on. I’m about the size that I was before my first pregnancy and that was small. I don’t like what I see in the mirror; I feel like a stick. I’m quickly getting to the point of wanting to stop breastfeeding just because I feel like that might help me put some weight back on.Should I be concerned about this? I’ve heard about postpartum thyroid issues, but I don’t seem to have any other symptoms. via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/xKRJT1L

Hi there, we are first time parents and NICU parents… What a wild ride has parenthood been for us so far! Our little one showed up at almost 26 weeks and has been in the NICU for close to 3 months now. Our baby’s progress was good until about a month ago, they needed to perform an emergency surgery (abdominal) we were then told everything looked good and that the team only needed to put everything back into place as the intestine was kind of herniated a little and that caused a blocage. That was supposed to be good news since they didnt need to remove any part and we were told that it might have been cause by a NEC that healed which seems to be the #1 challenge for preemies. Fast forward to a week ago when they started feeding her again, it went on for a couple of days then she threw everything up and they are suspecting an intestinal occlusion and we were basically told our baby will most probably need another surgery in a couple of weeks. We are completely lost and feel like we’re alone in this…Any parents out there that went through something similar and feel like sharing their story with us? We could really use some light and hope in what seems like an endless journey. Thank you via /r/NICUParents https://ift.tt/9WrZ03V

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I used to exclusively pump. Now I exclusively nurse. I had to pump for the first time in almost 3 months today and I got absolutely nothing. I raised the suction which made it hurt a bit but still nothing.I used to have a major oversupply with this pump, so it’s not a flange size issue.Has anyone else experienced this?The reason I had to pump was my teething baby is on a bit of a nursing strike so I felt engorged. via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/KcQ0tPV

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I haven’t been doing a great job eating during the day because I’m alone with my 6 week old who only wants to be held. I put him down when I can get away with it but that’s usually not very long. So what are some quick and filling snack or lunch ideas? What are you all eating when your boss says no lunch breaks or I’ll scream? I don’t want my supply to suffer via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/FfT0j24

I was 21 at the moment, first pregnancy. Found out with the second child my cervix was incompetent. Didn’t get a cerclage the first pregnancy.She was born around 1lb & 5oz i think. I was on IV, given 2 steroid shots for her lung development, and was in labor for over a day trying to avoid the birthing (i kept refusing pitocin). after i gave in, she was born 10 hours later, vaginally, in her little sac. 170 days at the nicu. @ inova fairfax, VA.Huge shoutout to the medical team there. I stayed at the Ronald Mcdonald housing and kept breast pumping. She received my colostrum under her tongue with a swab during oral care, which i believe was the sprinkle of me that helped her strive. Whatever it was, my micro preemie made it.She is over 1 today, next month will be a year since discharge. Still a touchy subject for me but wanted to encourage people to go to this NICU if they’re able to. I raised over 10 grand during my stay with tiktok. I have not updated the tiktok donors unfortunately, it was too much at the moment to share her progress. But to the ones in my situation, stay strong! Do research. & stay close to your little one 💛 via /r/NICUParents https://ift.tt/kjqzbQZ

Little one is 7 weeks. I was pumping between 300 and 400ml a day, and baby often didn’t want the bottle after breastfeeding, so I decided it’s time. It wasn’t easy, baby was at breast almost entire time during the day. I don’t remember much from the night, but I think I woke up maybe two times or so. There were a lot of wet diapers so she got enough to drink. Now it’s the next morning, baby gurgles happily, and I’m happy too. We did it! via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/kyiLvFQ

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Do I need a waterproof protector under my bassinet sheet? Also, does anyone deal with the corners of the bassinet pad curling with the sheets? This causes the corners to be more rounded and then there’s a tiny gap in the corners of the bassinet. via /r/pregnant https://ift.tt/yCXFaTl

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As the title suggests, my 5 week baby boy (I am a FTM) gets specially fussy in the night and doesn’t sleep well. Baby doesn’t sleep well during the day when breastfed. Today I pumped and fed, and baby slept for 3 hours straight, that too twice. Baby latches fine and we confirmed that he doesn’t have tongue tie. Sometimes he drinks for 30 minutes and sleeps off, and wake up in 30 minutes again. He only drains one breast and wakes up.My concern is when I pump, he may not be getting enough hind milk. How can I make sure he breastfeeds and sleeps well during the day?Thanks in advance. via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/1o0CjNi

If ever? Curious because my LO is 8 months now and still waking up 2 times a night. I know that’s not that much but I am so longing for a night where I can sleep THROUGH. Even now, I’d have to pump in the middle of the night if my husband took the entire night shift because my body is used to feeding her! I also currently pump in the MOTN to have enough milk for daycare, so I do have to be awake either way. When did your LO’s drop night feeds and start sleeping through??ETA: it is so nice to read all these responses! All of my friends have babies who are younger or the same age and sleep through the night. I thought maybe I was doing something wrong, it’s nice to know it’s very normal and (as always) every baby is different! via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/dPw2y6x

Yes, every baby is different. But please don’t be afraid to do what feels right to you. I nursed my son to sleep constantly in the first year. I woke up multiple times a night to nurse him and settle him and nurse him to sleep over and over during the first year of life. I actively weaned him between months 12-14 and transitioned to bottles of soymilk. And now at 18 months he does not nurse to sleep and actively squirms out of my arms after story time to get into his crib where he sleeps 10-11 hours uninterrupted. This has been the norm since about 14 months. It is possible. I never thought I’d get to this point when I was in the trenches of exclusively breastfeeding with a baby who woke up every 2-3 hours all night to nurse for the first 11 months of his life. Sleep will come, I promise. Tldr: I nursed to sleep all the time and now my son goes easily to sleep independently at 18 months without sleep training.ETA: he had stopped nursing over night on his own around 11-12 months via /r/breastfeeding https://ift.tt/WdLEKzx

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Our 29-weeker is getting ready to come home in just a few days. Other than hypoglycemia, she doesn’t have any issues that we know of. She’s just tiny, she was born with IUGR, she weighed only 860g. Right now she’s at 2,700g, she’s growing nicely. She has no problems with eating either. She will come home on low flow oxygen, as many preemies here due to high elevation. How did you handle your nerves when you could finally have your baby home? Not having all the medical support, the monitors, and just the lack of closeness of help scares me.We will get educated about the oxygen tanks and all that, but I wanted to know how did you guys find handling the situation. Was it messy, difficult, annoying? How do they decide when to take the baby off the oxygen? If you notice that the baby has a longer desat or a brady, what do you do other than stimulating? Sometimes I notice these events myself, but sometimes the machine beeps and I wouldn’t have told that the baby had something going on. I know that the doctors wouldn’t send her home if they thought it was unsafe, but I’m not trusting my judgement and I just have so many worries right now. I know I’m overthinking it probably but I keep spiraling around “what if I don’t wake up to my alarm in the middle of the night to feed her?” “what if I’m so exhausted that I don’t notice a brady during feeding and I don’t let her take a break?” and so on.I think what I’m looking for here is stories about how you got used to the situation, when was the first time that you weren’t just staring at your baby during the night until you passed out, etc.I’m extremely excited but also worried that I won’t be a good enough parent and that she won’t be safe with me. ♥️ via /r/NICUParents https://ift.tt/ZLIBNSd

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I never truly realized the depths of my trauma after my wife gave birth to our daughter at 27 weeks. I spent so long trying to be all strength while making no space for my own processing and emotions. Now almost a year later I am 6 sessions in with a trauma therapist, and my generalized anxiety that I see developed after my child’s birth has subsided greatly! I really am feeling like myself for the first time in forever, and I had an opportunity in a recent session to truly process my wife’s birth, and our NICU stay. Seriously, make space for this kind of help if you have the means. I know the stigmas exist and I know many of you probably feel guilty to prioritize yourself after birth, especially as we erroneously compare our experiences to those of birth parents. I’m here to say that the trauma needs your attention, and if you can make space for it in a healthy way, you may really begin to feel like you again ♥️ via /r/NICUParents https://ift.tt/GHtpnMJ

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My husband (31M) and I (31F) attended a wedding last weekend, it was a beautiful wedding with lots of his friends there and I was his plus one. The night before I asked my partner to check in with me/not ditch me or at least try to include me as i’m 20 weeks pregnant obviously, not drinking and driving us there and back (2 hour away/ 4 hours in total).I was a bit nervous as i wouldn’t be drinking either and for context, it was the first big event we have attended after finding out the baby news. I find some of his ‘group’ intimidating and they can often be ‘clicky’- he is well aware of my feelings on the subject.During the reception, I struggled to find him. He never looked for me or asked me if wanted a drink. I spoke to people, mingled on my own and met some lovely people. But I couldn’t shake the feeling he just kind of dropped me contrary to what we had agreed. I thought don’t worry- he’ll try later on, he’s just saying hi to all his friends…When we all sat down for dinner (we were on seperate tables- absolutely fine), during the meal, he didn’t check on me. Didnt even come over to say hi or even include me when he went to the bar. I saw a few other people’s partners doing this as lots of couples were not sitting together. Me being 20 weeks pregnant, I felt a tinge of embrassessment.After, the dinner I said something to him reminding him about what we spoke about the night/day before and spending some time with me. As the night went on it only got worse, he avoided me, and if I asked him to sit with me for a bit, he would go for a cigarette instead, he knows I don’t want to be around second-hand smoke. I asked him to sit with me once, he made an excuse about going to the toilet and never came back. Leaving me with one of his friends who wouldn’t stop touching my stomach (annoying but its drunk people being drunk.)If I was near my partner talking to others, he would make jokes about my ‘big’ boobs in front of his friends. I tried one last time to talk to him, as it was making me upset, but all he did was look over at his friends saying he missing out, just by being sat with me and walked off.All of his friends were drunk and didn’t want to be around the sober person which was fine but meant I was often alone for long periods of time from 12pm to 12am. When I asked to leave at 12 am (the time to wedding ended), he tried to say about staying longer and tried to get others to pressure me as well.I felt so disregarded, I haven’t said much to him since but the pain is still there. When we got home, he spend the day sleeping so, didn’t have a chance to even speak about it. I haven’t said anything yet, and if you ask – he has been on nights out recently even one that week- he went out drinking to 2am (so, its not like he hasn’t been able to have ‘his fun’).​Just one day, I wanted his consideration. Apart of me thinks some people would be like let him have his fun but it was a 12 hour period, during that period he never came over once to me to ask if his pregnant wife was okay.I have a right to be upset don’t I ? Or am I being an asshole for being upset? I know it was his friend’s wedding but I have never felt more unloved. via /r/pregnant https://ift.tt/pHeryBN

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I gave birth to my daughter a few months ago and I still can’t believe how my labour and delivery went down. I wanted to share my story so other pregnant moms can be aware and perhaps be a little more prepared than I was. I am a first time mom and I tried to educate myself as much as possible so that I would be prepared for the delivery room but I never came across anything about a precipitous labour so nothing could have prepared me for what was about to happen.I felt very off that day but I was not experiencing much pain or anything that felt like a contraction. Something just did not feel right so I told my boyfriend I wanted to go to the hospital to get checked out. We were told that I was not in labour and that I was only dilated 2 cm. They said that I should come back if I start to experience contractions that are 5 minutes apart. So we went home to wait. I still could not shake the feeling that something was not right. I still was not experiencing much pain but I had my boyfriend take me back to the hospital a second time two hours later. I was told again that I was not in labour, only two cm dilated and that I would probably not go into labour for a few days. They sent me home again and made me feel a little silly for coming back so soon. I felt like I was wasting their time.By the time I got home from the hospital the second time things had changed. I began to experience a very intense pain. The pain was not like what I was told to expect from a contraction. I could not time them or find a pattern, it was just a straight pain with no end.Since I had already been turned away at the hospital twice and I did not want to be embarrassed again, I tried to make myself comfortable and relax. After an hour of trying I could not take it and went back to the hospital. When I arrived the nurse did not want to check me again as I had just been sent away an hour ago. She tried to instruct me to go home and rest but I insisted that she check one more time and this time I was 5 cm dilated. I was told it would still be several hours until delivery but they admitted me and began to get me ready for an epidural.I did not make it to the epidural because as soon as I arrived in my room I began to have this intense urge to push. Another nurse noticed that I was pushing and quickly checked me again. This time I was 10 cm and the babies head was already present. My daughter was born 17 minutes after I arrived in my room. The doctor literally had to run into the room to make it in time. All together my labour and delivery took a little over 2 hours. I did not even have a chance to fully comprehend what was happening. In the end my daughter was born safely and she is very healthy.Sometimes I think about what could have happened if I had listened to the nurses and just stayed/ went home. I could have ended up having my daughter at home or in the car. I wanted to share my story because I want other moms to be know to listen to your body. If something doesn’t feel right make sure to insist that you get the care you deserve. Make the doctors and nurses listen to you. You know your body better than anyone. via /r/BabyBumps https://ift.tt/XNs6OB8

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Hey guys. This sub has been so good for my mental health and my escape place while I was pregnant. I delivered my sweet baby boy 5 days ago and he is so amazing! I will share my birth story soon (it’s a wild ride). But for right now I’m really hoping for some support about breastfeeding. Short version: I hate it. He won’t latch, and when he does it hurts. My nipples are pretty flat and I feel like that’s part of the problem. I know I could hire a lactation consultant, take classes, use nipple shields, pump, etc and fix it. But I don’t know if I even want to. Please please don’t give me advice on how to fix the breastfeeding – I know with hard work I can. I’m looking for reassurance that it’s okay if I want to stop for my mental health and, quite frankly, convenience.I know I only “tried” for 4 days, but geez it sucked (pun intended lol). I hated feeling like a tool or machine that existed only for feeding my child. I don’t really get the happy bonding feeling when he feed successfully, I just feel uncomfy and usually beg him to be done soon so I can rest or go back to what I was doing. Man that feels shitty to admit though. It feels selfish.Last night he REFUSED to latch and we finally made the decision to try formula for his health, he hadn’t eaten in 8 hours. We were scared. And damn the shift was instant!! He was so happy, and I was too. For the past 22 hours he’s only had formula from bottles and both physically and mentally I feel relief, and I cannot even tell you how different he is too. And yet, even writing all this out I still feel guilty. Like I’m some monster for wanting to stop completely. Like should I try to pump and supplement with formula? I tried to breast feed about 3 hours ago out of curiosity to see if we just needed a reset. He hated it. Immediately started screaming. I tried to stay positive but the rejection really hurt my heart. This was mostly just cathartic to write out. But if anyone really strongly disagrees for a legitimate reason, feel free to share. Also if anyone just wants to help me feel like this choice is okay, that’s great too. Thank y’all! I’m gonna go cry a little now. via /r/BabyBumps https://ift.tt/oyRsCI5

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My thoughts on my baby being in the NICUI hate that it feels like I need ‘permission’ to see MY baby. I totally understand that I need to check in and show my ID for safety reasons. However, it’s annoying. I have to follow all these rules for MY baby. I can’t just feed her when she’s hungry. When she was on the blue light for her bilirubin levels, I couldn’t just pick her up and hold her. I can’t wear jewelry. I have to use a specific sink to wash my hands before I touch her. I have to make sure the door to the isolette is closed whether she’s in there or not. -It’s hard to pick her up with all her wires and tubes and close the door before sitting in the chair to hold her. – I have seen signs that I’m not suppose to eat in the NICU, but I have ate my snacks because it’s a hassle to leave the NICU and I have to be let back in the room (again safety issue). Besides Dad and I, only FOUR people can see her and only two at a time. Those four people cannot change. There’s also a sign that says no using cell phone while holding baby (I also don’t listen to this, but I DO listen to the rule about cleaning your phone). There’s basically no private time with MY baby. When I’m breastfeeding or pumping, I have a privacy shield thing that goes around me, but it’s not perfect. I keep it around me when I’m done because I like the privacy. We’re just in a big open room with other babies and parents and nurses/staff. Along with no privacy… I feel watched ALL the time, especially if the privacy shield isn’t up. Sometimes.. I feel judged. I don’t want to be watched while I change her diaper. It takes me longer because all these freakin wires attached to her. Not to mention, I’m a first time parent and it’s been a hot minute since I’ve changed a newborns diaper. I also don’t want to be watched while I give a bath, change her clothes, etc. It feels downright WRONG every single time I leave the NICU without MY baby. It’s like leaving my heart behind for strangers to care for it. The feeling is AWFUL. I don’t feel like an active participant in her plan of care. Medications were added without us knowing (multivitamin and iron so nothing crazy), the feeding tube moved, she was moved to a new room, and we have absolutely NO say in when she’s ready to go home. We are just told what they are adding to my breastmilk “just extra calories” no real education about it or if I even have the option to refuse it. I feel scared to say no to anything because 1. I don’t want to be judged or labeled as a complicated mom & 2. I don’t want her stay to be longer. I literally just want her home ASAP. Plus, sometimes you don’t know what questions to ask. You don’t know what you don’t know. I also find it annoying that doctors don’t call and update you consistently. I get not calling everyday if nothing has changed but I think at the minimum, docs should be calling every 3 days. (Docs for adults call a family member everyday if asked/appropriate where I work). The alarms give me anxiety. In nursing school, it’s stressed “focus on the patient, not the machine / treat the patient, not the machine.” Well, it seems like there’s always some alarm going off in here. It makes me look up at her monitor and hope it’s not her. When it is her, I’m thinking “is she okay?! What can I do?!” Most of the time, she fixes her wacky vitals herself and quickly. Now that we are getting close to discharge, I am REALLY discouraged when she, for example, has a heart rate drop. This pushes the discharge date back every time it happens. Back to my nursing school knowledge, every heart rate drop that I have seen with her… she has LOOKED fine. She’s breathing with no color changes and it lasts like a second or two. Soooo it’s just really really distressful, upsetting, and discouraging. The drive back and forth SUCKS! It also sucks to plan around her ‘care times’ (the times that she gets vitals, diaper changed, and fed). That also goes back to I can’t just feed her whenever… she’s on a schedule. But if she were at home, she would be fed when she showed signs of hunger not at specific times. I feel like a LOT of my precious maternity leave has been ‘wasted.’ I haven’t gotten to spend nearly as much time with her as I want because it’s hard staying in this room. Plus, I don’t want to be at the hospital, I actually want to be home, but I want her WITH me at homeeeeeee. I feel like I have missed a LOT of bonding time with my baby. I feel very very robbed of my time with her & the experience I had in mind for delivery / postpartum. In summary, having a baby in the NICU is really difficult. I will say I know there are rules and schedules for these sweet babies for a reason. Our nurses have been extremely kind and update us when we come here or call. I am VERY thankful for all my daughters nurses & nothing about my post is negative to them. Even the privacy comment, I appreciate them checking on us and making sure we’re okay. It’s definitely taken a toll on me mentally, BUT she has been improving and getting stronger every day. I’m thankful she’s really just in the NICU because she was born prematurely & no other concerns. I know it could be worse and I am so so thankful she’s doing well and I KNOW she’s where she needs to be and the staff are taking good care of her. ❤️ via /r/NICUParents https://ift.tt/Uodr8Y1

https://ift.tt/uAU86TO via /r/toronto https://ift.tt/kX96UTj